You wouldn’t believe it, the singer says. There she was readying for her first album release in eight years, ecstatically in love with her current love, and at long last the mom to a little one after struggling to conceive for a decade, on top of the world. Then in March she was diagnosed with cancer in her breast.
The musician, birth name Jessica Cornish, is known for telling it as it is. The album, her latest release, was intended as an candid account, dealing with every bit of hardship she’d experienced since she last worked on songs (endometrial issues, losing a baby, broken romances, emotional abuse, suicidal thoughts) with typical candour. The initial release, her single No Secrets, was released in April. But by then there remained a major undisclosed truth. The illness. Later follow-up track, the upbeat Living My Best Life, was released in May and Cornish was giving interviews about how she was enjoying life to the fullest, while at the same time dealing with the disease. A month later she went public, and in early July she underwent breast removal surgery.
She gives me her best “What the fuck?” expression. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m conducting every press talk, and they inquire, ‘What’s happening?’ and I answer, ‘Uh, nothing really’” Cornish has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s still waiting for reconstructive surgery.
We’re at a photography studio in the capital. She is sporting a tan faux-leather coat, denim trousers with detailed white appliqués, off-white boots and big frames. Picture motorcycle style meets 1970s Nana Mouskouri. “It seems like I’m in the seventies and I should have a boyfriend with a big tache.” Like the film, I say, referencing the movie. “That’s what people called me at school!” She beams. She is fast-thinking, irreverent and blunt. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is aiming for her initial standup show next year. “I like entertaining. On stage I frequently joke about the audience.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
She was getting ready for an slot at the Baftas when she noticed an abnormality. “I quickly sought to get it examined, had an scan, and they were, like, ‘It looks like nothing; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I responded, ‘But I can feel it. My arm hurts and pins and needles in my hands whenever I get up.’ And they said, ‘Well, let’s just do a biopsy?’ The date was March 28, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was serious she’d call on the start of the week. By then the singer had persuaded herself it was fine. The way she explains it, it was just bad timing to face illness when she had so much on.
“It was a fortnight prior from launching this thing after years away and an extended break. And the doctor messaged and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I was, like, ‘A video call, likely minor.’ So I join the call believing it’s all going to be good, and she goes, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she says, ‘Unfortunately but your test results have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” What did you say? “I answered, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘My child depends on me.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She considered the operation frightening and surreal. “I hate being put under. They lead you. During crises you go on a gurney, but then I just strolled down with a gown on and my rear exposed. It felt surreal.” But, Cornish says, she’s been fortunate. No chemo, no radiotherapy, just the op. “Cancer is awful, but yet Luckily it was detected early. I underwent removal recently and my affected breast now looks like a grapefruit under a tight bedsheet.” She smiles again. “The nipple was preserved.”
The next operation is for health and appearance. Her breasts, she observes, are now “uneven. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. How rude! I reflected, why make it worse, I’m already having a hard period. So rude! Amusingly I said I’d never get my boobs done because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be perfect. Cancer ruined that plan.”
Previous Struggles
The singer is no stranger to illness. She feels her outlook on her diagnosis has been so upbeat because she’s experienced in health crises. They have often coincided with professional successes, serving as a tap on the shoulder, or shock, to make her recall not to assume everything is fine. “Honestly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘Enjoying yourself? Hold on.’ From a young age, it has consistently accompanied moments of success for me; something severe or obscure has affected my well-being.”
She recalls to her youth, already beginning performing in the stage in Whistle Down the Wind (she was selected at the age of nine). That’s when she was told about the cardiac issue a syndrome, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as vertigo and heart flutters. “I rehearsed between visits on an intravenous line, and going back into hospital at night.” She jumps ahead half a dozen years, and young Jessica has joined the female band Soul Deep while studying at the academy. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a stroke. Then when I was planning to release songs in the year 2020 I had a car crash and my voice box shifted and I lost my voice for a twelve months.”
Oi, I say, wait, I am overwhelmed. At just 17? She nods|agrees
